Lucky Ham
by Papayas Say That's Kooky
Summary: A new ham comes to town and she angering Pashmina? What's a ham to do? And a fight? UH OH! NO odd couples! I promise!


Hola!! Haily here!!! A new story about a dastardly Irish ham that's causing some trouble.

Mikes: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Shut up Milk! Anyway, please R+R. What do you think?  Odd couples? NAH! I'll just do regulars!!!!!!

Lucky Ham

            Hamtaro slid down the drainpipe and landed with an "oompa" on Brandy's head. 

            "See ya Brandy!" he exclaimed.

            Running along the tall grass, Hamtaro looked for some sunflower seeds.

            "Oh cats!" he muttered to himself.  "I was supposed to bring sunflower seeds and I didn't have any left!"  
            WHAM!

            Hamtaro was knocked backwards by something.  He kushi-kushied and look up.

            A light green hamster with white stripes like the Sandy and Stan's going down her head stood about Hamtaro.

            "Sorry 'bout that!" it exclaimed in a heavy Irish accent.  She picked up Hamtaro and scratched the darker green clovers on the back of her ears.  

            "I'm sorry, too!" Hamtaro said, looking over the hamster.  "What's your name?"  
            "Clover!"

            "Hello! I'm Hamtaro!"

            "I just moved here from Ireland!  I've been so lonely because I haven't seen any other hamsters!" Clover said.

            Hamtaro ginned.  "Well, if you help me look for seeds I can bring you to other hamsters!" 

            The other ham grinned.  "It's a deal!"  She leaned over and began to hif-hif.  With Clover, finding seeds was easier.

            They had a whole basketful in ten minutes. 

            "Thank-Q Clover!  Now c'mon!" Hamtaro exclaimed a led her to the tunnels and then to the Clubhouse.

            "Hamha everyone!  This is Clover!  She's from Ireland!" Hamtaro exclaimed and Clover smiled.

            "Top o' the morning to you!" she exclaimed.

            "Hello! I'm Boss!  I built this place!"  Boss said, holding out his paw.

            "Not a bad place Boss!" Clover complimented.  "Can I know your names?"

            "I'm Bijou!  I'm from France!"

            "I'm Dexter!  I'm from London (just pretend he is!)"

            "I'm Howdy!  I'm better than Dexter!"

            Dexter rolled his eyes.

            "I'm Maxwell!"

            "I'm, like, Sandy!"

            "I'm Pashmina and this is Penelope!" Pashmina said, pointing to the yellow clad hamster. 

            "I'm Panda!"

            "Zu zu…I'm Snoozer."

            "I'm Oxnard!"  
            "I'm Cappy!"

            "Jingle's the name."  
            "Hey gorgeous!  I'm Stan!!" Stan exclaimed and took Clover's paw.

            Clover giggled.  "Pleasure to meet you all!  And, what was your name?" she asked, pointing to Dexter.

            "Dexter."  
            "That's a very nice name!"

            Sandy and Bijou smirked, but Penelope frowned, pointing to Pashmina.

            "Like, what's up girlfriend?" asked Sandy worriedly.

            "Nothing Sandy!" her friend replied airily, but she was watching Dexter and Clover talking, Clover sitting a bit too close to Dexter than Pashmina liked.

            "You know Dexter, this is a great place!" Clover exclaimed and Dexter smiled.  Pashmina, who was watching, nearly melted at his smile.

            "Yes, I agree!  This is a wonderful place to play with the ham-hams!"

            The two continued talking, Clover moving closer and closer as the conversation continued.  

            "You know what makes this place the greatest?" asked Clover, spreading her arms.

            "Having everyone here?" Dexter said, turning his head to one side.

            "Yeah!  But most of all having you here!" Clover said and Pashmina turned quickly away.

            "Are you sure zhere iz nothing wrong, Pashmina?" asked Bijou.

            Pashmina sighed and shook her head angrily.  "Clover," she muttered and the girls simultaneously turned their head; then covering their mouths.

            All three took a sharp intake of breath.  Pashmina had hinted before she had like someone…and now they knew who it was!

            They kept watching and, lucky for Clover, Pashmina missed Clover's hand move towards Dexter's.

            They were going to say something, but they heard Boss and decided instead to listen.

            "Well, Hamtaro, did you bring seeds?  It's Stan's turn to pick an activity and tonight we're going to have a dance!!" Boss said and Bijou blushed tremendously.

            "Oui!  It vill be vonderful! Ve 'ave to bring a rose for those we like!" she said blushing a scarlet.

             _Wow!  That's going to be a lot of roses! I need one for everybody!  After all, I like EVERYONE in the Clubhouse!_

            "But right now we're going to have some races!" Dexter added.  "Of course, Stan says we have to have partners!"

            Sandy sighed.  "Stan!  You be with me!" she snapped just as Stan was about to sneak over to Bijou and Pashmina.  He sighed.

            "But sis…"

            "No buts!"

            Hamtaro went over to Bijou.  "Wanna be my partner Bijou?" he asked her and she blushed.  

            "Oui!"

            Boss was furious!  How could Hamtaro do such a thing?  His face turned scarlet and Boss stomped his foot (making the place shake) 

            Penelope skipped over to Cappy.  "Ookwee!" she exclaimed.

            "Sure!" replied Cappy.

            Stan was fighting with Sandy so she gave up.  "Like, fine!!" she exclaimed and walked up to Maxwell.

            "Will you be my partner?" she asked.

            Maxwell blushed so deep it looked like Mars.  "Sure Sandy!" he exclaimed and she nuzzled him.

            Oxnard cocked his head and tapped Boss.  "What's the matter?" he asked and Boss glared.  

            "Nothing!  C'mon!  Let's be partners!" he exclaimed.  

            Clover looked around amongst all the talking and spied Dexter.  She sighed.

            He was kind, smart, and handsome.  She had talked to him, so she knew this was true.  Looking over she could see by the way he was fighting with Howdy that he was winning.  Howdy kept saying "heke" a lot and Dexter was smiling.

            She edged closer to him to listen.

            "I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed person!" Dexter shot and Howdy looked alarmed.           

            "Darn tootin' stop usin' fancy words!!!!!" Howdy exclaimed and stomped off.

            "Now, to find Pashmina," Dexter murmured but Clover tapped him on the shoulder.

            "Will you be my partner?" she asked him and he sighed.

            _I'll be nice to her and be her partner.  It's her first time anyway! Dexter thought and nodded._

            Stan sidled up to Pashmina.  "How about being my partner babe?" he asked and she sighed, looking around for somebody else.

            Howdy was coming and she nodded quickly.  Anybody but Howdy.

            Stan cheered and Howdy sighed, heading over to Jingle.

            Clover smiled at Dexter.  "This is nice of you Dexter," she said and he smiled back.

            "Oh, well, just want to make everyone fit in you know!" he said and she blushed.

            Everyone lined up at the starting line, the girls holding the boys' feet. (or the boys' holding the boys' feet)

            The clock went off and everyone started to race.  Howdy and Jingle were the first one down; then Boss and Oxnard.

            Penelope and Cappy fell and giggled, getting back up to get some sunflower chips.

            Stan and Pashmina fell next and Pashmina gave a forced laughed, though she was looking at Dexter.

            Sandy and Maxwell fell next and burst out laughing together.  Sandy nuzzled Maxwell and pecked him on the cheek.

            "Like right on!" she exclaimed. 

            The finish line was a few yards away and Clover/Dexter and Hamtaro/Bijou were neck-in-neck.

            Bijou tripped and the two toppled to the ground.  They started laughing and smiled at each other.

            "Very good 'Amtaro!" she said and kissed him.  Boss practically sent fireworks out his ears.

            Dexter and Clover fell just as they crossed the finish line.  Everyone but Boss started laughing.    

            Pashmina was slightly angry.  Sure, Dexter wasn't her boyfriend, but she did like him-A LOT!

            Clover gazed at Dexter out of her blue eyes and smiled.  "Great Dexter!" she exclaimed and pecked him on the cheek.

            Dexter blushed and Pashmina flushed as well, though it was out of anger.  She didn't like this girl.  Something about her…

            Clover flashed a grin at Pashmina and raised her eyebrows.  Clover could tell by the way Pashmina was looking at her that she was jealous.

            She knew that if she wanted Dexter, Pashmina had to sort this out in a kind and polite manner.

            Walking up to Clover, she cleared her throat.  

            "Yes?" asked Clover snidely, for she was talking to Dexter about their victory.

            "May I talk to you?" asked Pashmina courteously and Clover nodded reluctantly.

            "You see Clover, I kinda like Dexter," Pashmina said while blushing.

            "Well so do I!  Everyone does!  Except for Howdy!" Clover said innocently, though she knew what she meant.

            _She's as clueless as Hamtaro!  No!  Wait! She must know what love is! She was being all friendly! Pashmina thought and sighed._

            "No!  I mean, I like him more than a friend!" Pashmina explained.  "And well, I've noticed you being a bit too-_friendly_-with him. I was just wondering if you could, well, back down a bit."

            She waited for the blow, but Clover grinned.  "Sure Pashmina.  Of course I can!" she said.

            Pashmina sighed.  "That's great!"

            She grinned wider.  "Oh and one more thing."

            "Yeah?"  
            "Just kidding! If you want Dexter, you can fight me for him!" Clover sneered and Pashmina fumed.  

            "Okay then Clover!" Pashmina replied and Clover snickered.

            "Not that she'll have a chance!" she murmured to herself.  Out loud she said, "Well, tootles Patina!" 

            Pashmina cringed.  Now what?  I mean, Dexter did like her!

            Well, he _used to!  He seemed to take an interest in Clover now!  Pashmina shook her head, and unable to hold it in, burst into tears._

            "Precious-mina!  What's wrong?" exclaimed Howdy, but Pashmina flung herself at Bijou.

            "Pashmina!  Vhat's wrong?" asked Bijou. 

            "Yes, Pashmina!  What's the matter?" Dexter piped in and Clover came over.

            "I'm sure she's fine-" Clover began but Pashmina slipped sideways into Dexter, shaking uncontrollably.

            Dexter looked alarmed and patted her back.  "It's OK Pashmina!  Whatever is wrong, it'll be alright!" he exclaimed and she calmed down.

            "Thank you Dexter," she said and stood up shakily.  Bijou took her and led her to Sandy.

            "What's with that girlfriend?" asked Sandy who had broken away from Maxwell.

            Pashmina explained and Sandy and Bijou gasped.  

            "Zhat wretched, wretched girl!" Bijou exclaimed and Sandy nodded.

            "So, you gotta get Dexter!" Sandy said eagerly and Pashmina nodded determinedly.

            "He will be mine!" she exclaimed.  (I'm sorry if Pashmina's OOC)

            That night, Pashmina went back to the Clubhouse for the dance.  She was in her prettiest scarf and even had a bow behind her ear (it was light pink might you)

            Jingle and Stan were the DJs and everyone was dancing. 

            Penelope came in a sari like dress, which covered her face.  Bijou came in with blue sequin ribbons and a long blue scarf (not like Pashmina's).  Sandy came in with ribbon wound around her like a dress, and Clover came in with a skirt with clovers on it.

            Everyone was dancing.  The girls, all except for Penelope, were sitting and talking.

            Maxwell came and nervously asked Sandy to dance.  A blushing Sandy left.

            Hamtaro came in with dozens of roses.  Bijou flushed when she saw him.

            "Vhy so many?" she asked and Hamtaro nodded. 

            "Well, you said to bring one for everyone we like, so I did!" he exclaimed and Bijou fell over anime style.  

            Hamtaro handed them out, but there was one pale blue one covered in gold shimmers that he handed to Bijou.

            "For the one I like most!" he said and Bijou flushed.

            "Hamtaro, do you love me?"

            "Of course!" Bijou's heart skipped several beats.  "I love all my friends!"

            She sweat-dropped.  "No. Not like zhat! I mean ze vay Sandy and Maxwell like each other." Bijou pointed to the happy couple in the corner.

            Hamtaro blushed.  "Like a boy-ham! I do like you that way…Bijou," he said and Bijou smiled.

            "I love you too!" she exclaimed and they kissed. 

            Pashmina chuckled.  The two looked so cute together.  Bijou winked at Pashmina and held a thumbs up.  The pink clad hamster glanced at Dexter and Howdy, and slowly got up.

            "What do ya mean? Precious-mina will wanna dance with me, not you!" Howdy exclaimed and Pashmina sighed loudly, making both boys look up.

            "Howdy, will you get my name right?" Pashmina asked irritably.   She was sick of him calling her "Precious-mina!'"

            Howdy grinned.  "Of course!  How 'bout dancin' with me?" he asked and Pashmina shook her head.  She turned to Dexter-but he wasn't there!  HE WAS BY CLOVER!!!!!

            _She looks a bit lonely; I'll ask her to dance! Dexter thought cleared his throat._

            "Care to dance?" asked Dexter and Clover flushed deeply.

            "Aye," she said and the two got up.

            Pashmina shook her head angrily and sat down.  Stan immediately took a brake from being the DJ and headed over to her.

            "Why the long face?  Wanna dance with me?" asked Stan and she shook her head.

            It was Stan's turn to look sad and he stalked off.

            Pashmina watched Clover and Dexter dance.  

            "Thank you for dancing with me Dexter!" Clover exclaimed and Dexter smiled.

            "You looked somewhat lonely, so I figured it'd be good to cheer you up!" 

            Clover smiled.  "I was lonely, until _you came along!" _

            Dexter flushed and the two danced some more.  As soon as the song was done, Dexter went up to Jingle.

            "Can you play a slow song?" he asked and Jingle nodded.

            Pashmina sighed as the slow song played.  Dexter's probably dancing with Clover.  

            But instead, he came to her.  "Uh, Pashmina?  Will you d-d-dance with me?" 

            She blushed and smiled.  "Of course."

            The two danced slowly and Pashmina's saw Clover sneer.  As soon as Clover sat down, Stan asked her to dance, which she accepted.

            The lights were dimmed and a disco ball spun lazily from the ceiling.  The music wrapped around Pashmina like a silky scarf and she closed her eyes, leaning her head on Dexter's shoulder.  Though the two didn't know it, everyone was getting off the floor for Dexter and Pashmina. 

            Bijou and Sandy giggled wildly, clapping a hand over their mouths.  They knew that Clover had no chance, that Dexter loved Pashmina.

            Or did he????????????

            Dexter looked at Pashmina, then to Clover. _Maybe they both like me!!!_ he thought happily and then frowned.  _No, nobody smoochies me! I guess Pashmina was being polite…but what about Clover? I have a feeling she DOES smoochie me!_

He tossed the thoughts aside and enjoyed his dance.  The song ended a big too quickly for Dexter's liking and he pulled himself away reluctantly.

            "Thank you Pashmina.  You can go now," he said and she smiled, slipping away.

            Clover immediately came over to him.  "How about dancing with me now?" she asked and Dexter nodded.

            _Clover is nice!  I love her accent!  It's different! I really hope she's having fun with all the ham-hams!      _

As though reading his thoughts, Clover nuzzled Dexter making him go red.  The rest of the time the two danced together.

            The dance was drawing to an end and everyone was heading home.  

            "Thanks for dancing with me!" Clover exclaimed, kissing Dexter lightly, and she strolled away.

            "Yes, thanks for dancing with me, as well," Pashmina added, and as an afterthought she pecked him.

            "So, Boss-man, are you angry?" asked Stan.  Dexter knew he meant about Bijou.

            "No.  I mean, I can't change the way she feels, and she told me she thought of me as a big brother.  That's good enough.  Besides, I'd rather have Hamtaro go out with her than you," he replied and Stan sneered.  

            "Yeah, yeah.  That's ok, though.  I have Pashy-babe!" 

            Howdy turned angrily.  "NO WAY! PRECIOUS-MINA IS MINE!" he yelled and Stan laughed.  

            "You wish!"  
            Dexter sat down next to Howdy and took out a book, reading quietly.  He should have been going home, but Curtis was away for a while, so Dexter was staying at the Clubhouse.  

            Howdy and Stan turned to Dexter, jealousy gleaming in their eyes.  

            "Say, how come she danced with you and not us?" asked Stan angrily.

            Dexter stared up towards the sky.  He watched as the moon slipped in front of some clouds, casting an eerie light.  The stars winked and smiled, as though encouraging him to get some unknown task done.  

            "I don't know," Dexter said calmly, looking back at the book.  There was a moment of silence, but before an argument broke out, he walked away.  

            At the Clubhouse, Dexter snuggled into his red sheet, sliding an eye-cover for sleeping over his eyes and flicking out the light.  To pass the time, Dexter thought of everything he did.  He edited out all the fighting he did with Howdy, though replayed the part where Pashmina told Howdy to stop calling her Precious-mina.  

            His eyes flickered closed right after he ended the thought of dancing with Pashmina.  A smile slowly spread across his gray face as sleep over-took him.

            Boss checked the chart and smiled.  "It's your turn to pick an activity Penelope!" he exclaimed and she gave an excited Ookwee.

            "Ookyoo, ookwee, ookyoo!" she exclaimed.  Pashmina translated.  

            "She says she wants to have a dress up!" Pashmina explained. 

            Penelope was thinking hard.  "Ookwee!" she added.

            "And then a play," she finished, crossing her arms.

            "Like, soooo cool!" Sandy exclaimed.  "I wanna be a gymnast!"

            Stan shook his maracas.  "I wanna be a rapper!  Yo, yo, yo!" 

            While everyone was talking, Penelope sat in a corner, appearing to be writing something.  After about a half hour, she showed it to Pashmina.

            Several squiggles were drawn across the page. 

            Pashmina sweat-dropped.  "Uh, can you read that to me?" she asked, taking the paper and flipping it over to the blank side.

            Realizing she didn't know how to write, Pashmina looked around.  Maxwell was busy with Sandy, so she wouldn't bother him.   The only other ham who knew how to write was Dexter.

            She strolled over to him.  "Can you copy something for me?" she asked and Dexter smiled.

            "Anything for you!" he said and held the pencil over the paper.

            "Oh, Dexter, that's soo nice of you!" Clover exclaimed and Dexter looked at her funny.

            "Uh, thanks…" he said slowly and Clover started yapping. 

            "You know, I always like kind people.  They do a lot of nice things and…"  
            "Dexter?  Uh, Dex?  Can you, um, write now?" Pashmina asked

            "Yeah sure Pash-"

            "And then when they…" Clover was still talking and pulling him away from Pashmina.

            Dexter looked at her.  "Stop please," he said firmly and she looked taken aback.  

            "Oh well anything for you.  You know I…"

            Dexter looked at her, frowning.  "Why are you always doing that?  Every time I try and talk to Pashmina, you pull me away."

            It was true.  It had been a few days since the dance and Clover was getting more competitive.  Pashmina, however, had a doubting feeling.

            Clover looked abash.  "Oh, I'm soo sorry…" she began and Dexter turned to Pashmina.  

            "Yes…"

            It turned out Penelope's paper was a script.  Everyone had a part.  Dexter wrote it out and made copies.  

            The parts were:

            Sandy: gymnast

            Stan: rapper

            Penelope: princess

            Pashmina: queen

            Dexter: street hamster

            Clover: advisor

            Hamtaro: prince

            Bijou: Princess #2

            Howdy: jester.

            And so on and so forth.  The play somehow fit together, though no one knew how.  Everyone's part had a place.

            Clover, however, was going against the script.  Clover was supposed to be evil, but instead, she kept pretending to fall in love with Dexter.

            "Ookwee!  Ookyoo!" Penelope exclaimed, who was director as well. 

            "She wants you to stop!" Pashmina interrupted.  Clover paid no attention. 

            "And it is you whom I…"

            Pashmina's bubbled burst.  "STOP!  I'M SICK AND TIRED OUT THIS!" she shouted.

            "What's the matter Pashy?  Jealous?" asked Clover teasingly and the two girls erupted into a fight.

            "Girls, girls.  You don't need to fight over me!" Stan exclaimed, but their "battle raged on."

            Everyone tried to stop the fight.  They tried pulling the two away from each other, they tried yelling, they even tried stepping in the middle of the two.  Nothing worked.

            Finally…

            "OOOOOOOOOOKYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Penelope and everyone looked at her.

            "She wants to know what's up," Pashmina said, not really hearing her own words.

            "Yeah!  What's wrong with you guys?" asked Hamtaro.

            "Well, uh, you see," Clover began.

            Pashmina sighed.  She was also at a loss for words.  An explanation would not present itself and she racked her.

            "You see Dexter, me and Clover have been fighting over you," Pashmina informed him.

            Dexter flushed.  "Me?  Why-I-well-um…"

            "And you clearly like me, don't you Dexter?" asked Clover, pushing Pashmina aside.

            "He's mine!" she whispered to Pashmina.

            "Uh-well-you see…" Dexter stuttered.

            "Dexter, we've been being very mean, and it took me now to realize you are not a 'thing.'  Nobody can own you and we've been fighting for you like you were a possession.  It's up to you, Dexter, who do you love?"  
            Regaining himself, Dexter sighed.  He looked over the two girls and finally said, "I love Pashmina."

            Clover gasped, throwing herself off the stage.  "How could you?  I-I"

            "However, she was interrupted by a knock on the door.  Everyone turned and Hamtaro opened the door.

            "Ciao!  My name is Anthony!  I 'ave come for a girl name Clover?  You see her?" said a hamster in the door.  He was light red with red zig-zags all over his body.  

            Clover hid behind Dexter, who was holding hands with Pashmina.  He stepped aside and Clover was revealed.

            "Clover!  Bambina!  Where 'ave you been?  I've been looking for you?  How could you desert your fiancé?"

            Clover flushed and everyone looked at her.  "I-I…"

            "You have a FIANCE?" asked Boss, astounded. 

            "Yes.  I left him though because I DON'T LOVE HIM!" 

            Anthony paid no attention.  "Come my dear, the wedding is in a week!" he exclaimed and then turned to Boss.

            "Did you build this place?  You 'ave a shovel, so I thought you might 'ave." he asked and Boss nodded.

            "Yep."

            "It's very good!  I got to this place by falling down a hole, though.  Sorry."

            Boss moaned.  "That's ok, I'll fix it."  
            Anthony dragged Clover out.  "Ciao bambinos and bambinas!" he exclaimed and they left.

            Silence filled every place, every crack, every cranny.

            "Well, anyway, let's, um, get on with a new play!" Hamtaro said and everyone looked at him.

            "HA HA HA!  HA HA HA!" Oxnard exclaimed, bursting out laughing.

            The laughter slowly spread around the room until everyone was on the ground, clutching their sides.

            After this little fit, they began a new play.  Stan and Howdy approached Dexter.

            "Hey, Dex, we won't bother you.  We know Pashmina loves you and we can't change that.

            "Yeah," added Howdy.  "Though, I still will share my jokes with her."

            Dexter smiled.  "Thanks guys," was all he said and they three climbed on stage.

All done! This is probably my longest fic every.  Did you like it?  Sorry if Pashmina was OOC I really am sorry!  I tried my hardest!  I though you might like this!  Oh, and some proof.

            As you know, Sandy and Maxwell and Dexter and Pashmina are official couples.  (Yes, I'm pretty sure of this. I heard Dexter saves Pashmina from a river.)  Penelope is undecided.

            H/B and B/B thing is still going on however.  But I have proof that H/B will win.  If you got the hamtaro.com and click on the "Who's he?" page it will bring up a chart.  Click on Hamtaro or Bijou or any of the hams and it will bring up a chart.  At the top it says "We know Bijou likes Hamtaro, but will Hamtaro ever like her back?"

            This is saying that they are probably an official couple.  Just a thought I'd like to tell all H/B fans.  Now, I like H/B more than B/B, but I do like B/B

            Oh well! Anyway, I am thinking about writing a B/B fic (hint hint WannaKnowLee) 

Ciao, Haily

Adios, Milkes   


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